Biopsy update

I went back for my results today. The doctor is pretty confident that I do not have cancer. I’m so thankful to hear that! These past 2 weeks have been hell! I’ve been stressing and worrying myself to death. He does want to see me again in 6 months and possibly do this all over again. I was sent to get more blood work done because he’s thinking this ordeal is because of either Hashimoto’s or PCOS. The two usually go hand in hand but my endocrinologist should be able to clear this up. I meet with the endo on the 21st. Just thought I would give you all a happy update 🙂

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Under all of the makeup

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Warning: this is gross!
I see all of these bloggers and youtubers doing makeup free posts. They talk about self confidence and how freeing it is to not wear makeup. But they look flawless even without it. I get that they are trying to tell other women that we are all beautiful with or without makeup. I understand that everyone has something they are insecure about under their makeup. That still doesn’t change the fact that whenever I see these posts I read or watch them with a smirk thinking to myself “yeah right, if you had my skin you wouldn’t be doing this makeup free crap.”

It’s so discouraging looking at those flawless faces with maybe one or 2 barely there blemishes. I can’t relate to them. I can’t go to the grocery store without makeup. Why? Because my skin is so terrible I look like a meth addict!
I wanted to share these nasty ass pictures with all of you going through the same struggle as me. So we have someone to relate to. Thanks to my busted thyroid this is what I live with every day, and it’s not just on my face! It’s on my chest, arms, back, the back of my legs, and in my hair. I wish I could change it but I can’t. I just have to learn to accept it…somehow. Could it be worse? Oh yes! I’m thankful it isn’t but it doesn’t change the fact that it’s still embarrassing.

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Biopsy day

  Today was the day. The day I’ve been terrified of for a few months now, biopsy day. I prepared myself as much as I could. I read any and everything I could find online. I went in pretty confident…that didn’t last long.
   The first thing the Dr did was an ultrasound of my thyroid.  He said the “complex cyst” had grown a bit, but usually thyroid nodules were benign.  He then used the ultrasound to check for blood flow in the mass/cyst/nodule/whatever. He said he was pretty concerned because there was a lot of blood flow activity. There went my heart rate. 
  Next he “numbed the area”<I put that in quotations because it did nothing but burn like hell.  He stuck in another needle to take the sample.  Let me tell you…..that was soooooo painful!  Everything I read online said it wouldn't hurt, its LIES!!! I felt every second , every push and pull, everything.  Thank god he only had to do it once. I heard it could take a few tries for get a good sample. Not with this girl! I would have passed out!!
  Technically this procedure is called a Fine Needle Aspiration, but referred to as a biopsy (i guess it still is a biopsy but not as invasive) most times because most people don't know what a FNA is.  I'll get my results in 2 LONG weeks.  I was pretty swollen, and I'm really sore. I'm hoping for the best but I'm also researching like crazy about the worse. 

What I’m really scared of

With my biopsy approaching I’m filled with so many different emotions. I thought I would be indifferent about it, I usually am when I’m scared of something. I try to hide it.
The other night I was in the bed with my 3 year old by my side (yes she still sleeps with me from time to time) and I started to cry. I was picturing me kissing her as I went in the doctor’s office, trying to be strong for her. The truth is I’m not afraid of cancer, I’m afraid of not being able to take care of my children.
I’m not much help right now. I’m so tired all the time, I’m depressed, my hair is falling out and I’m in constant pain, thanks to my thyroid. It’s hard to make it through the day let alone be one of those “have it all together” moms. Some days are great but most of the time I’m just wishing I could sleep.
I’m nervous about the biopsy because I really don’t know what to expect. And IF there is cancer…what’s going to happen? My husband isn’t here to help, we have 2 girls, and all of our pets that need my attention. I haven’t talked about it much with anyone because I’m scared. I haven’t admitted I’m scared, or that I’ve cried about it. It’s overwhelming and I’m kind of paralyzed until I get the results.

“Every human being is the author of his own health or disease.” -Buddha

New chapters

Hello everyone! I’ve been a slacker lately, but it’s for a good reason! My thyroid biopsy is Friday so I’ve been getting things in order around the house just in case I feel blah afterwards. But the biggest thing is I’ve enrolled in an interior decorating college course! I’m so excited to begin this new chapter in my life! It’s something I’ve been wanting to do for a long time now but I thought it was something we couldn’t afford or I had the time for. Well I can do both. The course I’m taking includes the CID (certified interior decorator international) exam and dues for the first year. Maybe I’ll go on to do interior design, but decorating is something I’ve always had a passion for. I’ve really thrown myself into this and I’ve already completed a few lessons. I’ll still try to post as much as possible 🙂

Be a tourist in your town

While on vacation in Navarre FL, I was so excited to get out and enjoy the beach life. Then I thought, why am I not doing this every day in NC? I’m literally 2 miles from the beach! I work on an island, you have to pass the beach to get anywhere here. Why was I taking our charming little town for granted? The answer is, I’ve lived here my whole life, except for a few years in California. I thought I had seen it all, but I haven’t even scratched the surface.

When we came home I decided to be a tourist in my home town. I picked up one of those tourist guides and found out there is actually a ton of things to do around here. I had no idea we had a dog friendly restaurant! Or that I could take a free stand up paddle boarding class. My point is, look at your town with your tourist glasses on.
I hear so many people complain about where they live. Especially military wives, they don’t get out and explore. They spend so much energy hating it that they can’t see any good. Here’s my tips for being a tourist in your town.

1. Go to your welcome center, if you have one. Get a tourist guide, free coupons, even a map. You may be surprised at what you find.
2. Ditch your car. Go downtown, or a place you haven’t been to in a while and walk around. You see things in a different light when you aren’t passing by in your car.
3. Go to your local farmers market.
4. Or get out of your town and find a neighboring town to do these things. Even if you’ve been there a million times.
5. Shop local.
6. Have lunch with a friend at a little hole in the wall place you’ve passed up before.

These are just a few little things but I truly believe in supporting our local economy and I think if we all looked at our towns like tourist do we would all be happy. Don’t let the day to day consume you to the point that you hold a grudge against your home town. This is a little easier for me because I do live in a tourist town but I believe every town has something great to offer.

Oh you must be one of those crazy PETA people

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard that. The second you mention cruelty free or anything in that category people assume you are a PETA supporter. I am an animal rights supporter not a PETA supporter. There is a HUGE difference. I am against the killing of any living creature (which is why I’m working towards living a vegan life.)
Can you blame people for assuming this? No. PETA is a household name because of their antics. It’s the only “activist” group that most people know. But most people don’t do the research or even listen to PETA’s agenda. I’m sure many, many moons ago PETA started with good intentions but that is not the case today. Do your own research if you don’t know what I’m talking about an see for yourself.
But this post isn’t to expose PETA’s dirty secrets. It’s to inform people that there is a difference. Also to let people know if you are new and thinking of supporting them please take a trip to your local shelter and volunteer, donate a bag of dog food, or some toys. They are the real ones needing your support. We have rescued animals, my horse was a rescue, my ferret came out of a dumpster, and we took our pit home right before he ended up in the shelter. That is doing your part for animals.

May all beings be free from enmity;
May all beings be free from injury;
May all beings be free from suffering;
May all beings be happy.
Buddhist Prayer for Animals to be Free From Suffering.

**this anti PETA rant may piss some people off but these are my personal beliefs, to each it’s own.**

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Liebster Award!

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Hello everyone!  I woke up this morning to find out I was nominated for the Liebster Award by Kelly Lynne.  Thank you so much!  It’s nice to know someone is out there reading this. I’ve been given 10 great questions to answer and then I’ll have 10 of my own. But first here’s the rules for those of you I nominate:

Rules
1. Answer the questions given and then come up with 10 new ones to ask your nominees.
2. Nominate 8 other blogs, let them know you have nominated them and put a link to their blog in your post.
3. No Tag backs.
4. Nominees must have under 200 followers on any platform.
5. You must tell all the blogs that you nominate that you have nominated them.

With that being said…here we go with my questions from Kelly Lynne.

1. Why did you begin blogging?  I don’t really have one answer for this one. I began blogging out of boredom, wanting some sort of outlet for my creativity and love of all things.  Also I’ve had a few people ask me for hairstyles I’ve worn before or makeup tips so I thought I’d put it all in one place.

2.  Name one thing that makes you happy. Other than my family and animals, it would have to be music. I appreciate all genres and have a deep respect for most artists.  I was in chorus from 3rd grade all through high school. I love it!

3. What is your favorite quote? Hmmmm, another one I don’t have just one answer for.  One of my favorite and one that I think is so true is from a Rilo Kiley song….”We’re just recreation for all those doctors and lawyers.”   It’s one that struck me and I see it as to be true since now that I have to deal with doctors A LOT!

4. Where do you come from? I am from a little beach town in North Carolina.  I wouldn’t trade growing up here for anything and I love that we get to raise our children in the same town.

5. Name your top five favorite blogs. Some are here on wordpress but some aren’t.  1- Leila Lina      2-Cruelty-Free Confidence        3- Liz Marie Blog     4-  beautyosauruslex  5-   Elle Fowler (she’s on youtube)

6. What or who inspires you the most? Other than my family of course, it would be nature.  I love flowers, bright colors, animals, and the smells.

7. If you could invite 3 people (living or dead) to dinner who would they be? First my grandpa who passed away when I was in 8th grade.  We were each others everything and I wish he could meet my husband and kids. Then it would be John Lennon, and Audrey Hepburn.

8. What is your favorite social media: Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Pinterest or other? Instagram and Pinterest fo sho!!

9. What is your favorite post you have written? Include link.  I think it would have to be my living room make over.  It took a while to do and it’s ever changing but I LOVE my living room now.

10. What is the hardest thing you’ve found about blogging? The “haters” of course.  Believe it or not it’s been from people in my personal life not strangers on the internet like most have.

I nominate the following…

Cruelty-Free Confidence

Kitty Approved Beauty

Compassionate Beauty

Glam Nation Organic Skin Care

I know it says 8 but everyone else has already been nominated a million times and I didn’t want to bug everyone!

My questions for you…

1. What station/artists do you play the most on Pandora/Spotify?

2. What beauty/skin care product can you not live without?

3. If you could live anywhere in the world where would it be?

4. What strange habit do you have?

5. What is your guilty pleasure?

6. Your favorite post you have written, include link.

7. What’s your favorite time of the year?

8. What is your favorite thing to blog about?

9. How has blogging changed your personal life?

10. Picture your 16 year old self. Is your life today anything like you thought it would be? Is it better, worse, and why.

And there you go, hope you all have fun with these questions!

Get rid of acne the cruelty free way

Hello everyone! We are back from Florida and finally settled back in. Our oldest daughter started school the day after we got back so we have been busy!

I wanted to share with you all how I’ve finally started to get a handle on my acne. I’ve written about this acne mess before and shared with you an amazing cruelty free face wash I use every day. My breakouts were going away but I was still having some trouble. When we first arrived in Florida my break out was pretty bad. I’m blaming it on the stress of driving 14 hours with 2 kids, and that truck stop burger I was brave enough to eat! I didn’t really want to leave our beautiful condo but needed something extra. So I opened the fridge and grabbed the lemon juice. I have never tried lemon juice but O…M…G!! I washed my face, applied the lemon juice as a toner, let that dry then moisturized. The next morning I could already see results! Those nasty pimples were drying up, my skin was looking brighter, and after doing it for almost 2 weeks straight a big scar I had from acne is starting to fade! Why did I wait so long to try this? The only down side is it will burn the acne a little but most toners do that any ways. It’s fast, inexpensive, and you are staying cruelty free! What more could you ask for? I don’t have a picture to go along with this post so I’ll just leave you with this guy we saw at the zoo…enjoy:)

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Family vacation! Pt 1 condo review

We made it to Navarre fl late Monday night. Our condo at the Summerwinds Resort is so beautiful! The pictures online weren’t great but we decided to stay here because it was in a nice area, close to a lot of family friendly things, and right on the beach. I figured it doesn’t really matter what the condo looks like because we will be out anyways. I was shocked when we walked in! The condo is huge and it feels like home. We will absolutely stay here again. On top of being right on the beach there are 3 pools and 3 hot tubs. Next to the condo there is a little bar and grill, an Italian bistro and gift shop. I don’t want to leave!
We actually live in a vacation town in NC. I work for a beach vacation rental place but I am still struck by this resort. The condos are clean, newly renovated and spacious. We haven’t had a problem with hearing guests above us stomping around or any unwanted noise. If you are planning a trip to Florida I would recommend this place to anyone!

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